


Last Christmas

by nishiki



Category: The Umbrella Academy (TV)
Genre: Abusive Relationships, Bisexual Diego Hargreeves, Christmas, Christmas fic, Drug Addict Klaus Hargreeves, Emotional Hurt, Emotional Hurt/Comfort, Emotional/Psychological Abuse, Fluff and Hurt/Comfort, Good Brother Ben Hargreeves, Good Brother Diego Hargreeves, Hurt Klaus Hargreeves, Hurt/Comfort, Klaus Hargreeves Needs A Hug, Klaus Hargreeves Needs Help, M/M, Past Abuse, Past Relationship(s), Physical Abuse, Protective Ben Hargreeves, Protective Diego Hargreeves, now and then
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2019-12-08
Updated: 2019-12-10
Packaged: 2021-02-26 04:48:37
Rating: Teen And Up Audiences
Warnings: Graphic Depictions Of Violence
Chapters: 3
Words: 10,018
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/21707743
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/nishiki/pseuds/nishiki
Summary: Exactly one year ago, Klaus had been stuck in an abusive relationship. This year, things are looking better.
Relationships: Diego Hargreeves/Klaus Hargreeves, Klaus Hargreeves/Original Male Character(s)
Comments: 31
Kudos: 213





	1. Chapter 1

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Originally, this was meant to be a one-shot but I decided to split it into 3 chapters instead so that it would be easier for you guys to read <3

**December 2013**

Looking back on his life just one year ago, it seemed a miracle that he was where he was right now. Of course, Klaus Hargreeves did not honestly believe in miracles of any kind - which was perhaps a little odd considering the fact of how he was even born. He was a miracle child. Yet, he was very well aware that it had been no miracle propelling him into this new situation right now. In fact, it had only been the doing of his brother who was currently shimmying to some stupid Spanish folk song in their narrow kitchen. 

Had someone told him a year ago that he would be here now - no longer homeless and a fucking hopeless drug addict, he would say they were crazy. A year ago he wouldn't have thought that there was any other life for him out there. No way Jose! And yet here he was, watching Diego shimmying through their kitchen unaware that Klaus was already awake, singing into a wooden spoon in Spanish. In fact, he would claim that Diego was the only reason why he was alive right now. 

Sure, Diego had saved his life on more than one occasion growing up. On missions and later from one OD after the other. Last year, however, it had not been this simple.

※※※※※※※

**December 2012**

The air was cutting cold, his breath fogging in front of his face as the December wind poked his skin like thousand tiny little needles. He was used to running around in the cold, had done it for longer than he cared to admit ever since his father had kicked him out of the house six years ago. Back then he had not even been eighteen years old and now he was twenty-three and none the wiser. However, this year it was the first Christmas in six years that he would not spend on the streets or in some random homeless shelter because Benny kept nagging him to look for shelter. 

This year, he had a roof over his head, a home, something warm to eat, and someone to celebrate Christmas with. 

He was wearing new real Italian leather boots against the cold - at least that was what the tag said. Of course, you can't buy real Italian leather shoes for 20 bucks and everyone knows that. 20 bucks were a lot of money for someone like Klaus. For twenty bucks he used to go down on his knees behind dumpsters on occasion when he was especially desperate for a hit or just something to eat.

His boyfriend, Grant, bought him those shoes a little while ago. Of course, this action had not been motivated by some selfless desire to just help out a man in need and Klaus was not nearly naive enough to believe that. There was no love involved in that relationship either - not initially, at least though he would confess that he felt  _ something  _ for the other man now. Life on the streets was like one big trading market. And the only good he had to trade-in for a nice place to stay and food or money for drugs was his body. And Grant … Well, he had all those things. It was a win-win situation. A fair deal. Easy. It helped, that Grant had been crushing hard on him when they first met.

And it wasn't even the first time that Klaus had found someone who was willing to let him stay with them. There had been that one girl, Tanja, a few years back when he had barely been eighteen. She had been a little older - in her fifties if he recalled correctly - a right cougar, actually. When she had heard that he was legal - Oh boy, she had been all over him. Not that Klaus had anything against women … he just preferred guys. Still, he had been only eighteen and desperate for a place to stay and Tanja had been adamant to save him and parade him around in front of all her sexually frustrated girlfriends. To her husband, Klaus had been Tanja’s dirty little secret that she allowed to sleep in her atelier in downtown. She had kicked him to the curb when she had caught him fucking some random dude in her atelier though. Well, should've seen that coming, he guessed. 

Other than this he had had stayed here and there for a couple of days. This thing with Grant, it was going on for three months now. It felt almost like a real relationship, almost like something serious. Of course, that was bullshit. At the end of the day, Grant was a man like everyone else. To Klaus, that meant that there was no arguing about what Grant wanted or not. They had a deal going on and he was expected to uphold his end of the bargain. And if not … well … Klaus caught sight of his face in the window of some high fashion boutique. He was used to seeing his face injured in some way. After all, he was homeless and homeless junkies were always fair game to any kind of people. Still, seeing his split lips awoke something inside of him that he couldn't quite name yet.

"You should really go talk to someone." Ben, always the nagging presence beside him, always his own personal Jiminy Cricket. Not that he wouldn't love Ben but … sometimes his brother could get a bit annoying. Especially when he would repeat the same things over and over again. "You could call Vanya, perhaps." He gave a scoff and marched onwards. He was already running late. Grant had expected him back twenty minutes ago. Dinner was probably already cold. Fuck. At least he was almost home. He just needed to get down this street and around the next corner. "Or Allison! She’ll probably help you out if you’d just ask her."

"Allison has her Hollywood career, her Hollywood husband, and her Hollywood baby. There is no room for her junkie brother in her life." 

"Then go to Luther! Just, come on, Dude! If you’d call him and ask him to meet up, he would come and you know that! Luther would help you in a heartbeat!"

"You mean the Luther who threw me across the room when we were fourteen? Or the Luther who literally kicked me out of the house on Dad’s orders six years ago?" He paused for a second to glare at Ben. His dead brother always tried to see the best in their siblings. Sometimes naively so. Which was odd because alive Ben had not been nearly as naive as this. "The same Luther who had not once shown up at the hospital when the house was called because I OD’ed? That Luther?"

"Diego-"

"No, Ben."

"But Diego would-"

"No, he really wouldn't. He made that very clear. Remember? Because I do." Diego and his “break-up” four years ago had been all kinds of messy and awful and a nightmare. Of all his siblings, Diego had always been his favorite. That was just a fact of life. There was no way around it. Sure, he and Allison had had their moments, yes, and he had even gotten along with Five for the most part - not to mention Benny. But Diego and he … they had always had a special bond. Two peas in a pot. And so, of course, he had gone to his favorite sibling for help when everything had become too much. 

Fuck, better not think about it. Since then, the name Diego was pretty much a dirty word between Ben and Klaus. Of course, Klaus knew that Ben was largely on Diego’s side. He was probably right to be on Diego’s side. After all, when was the last time that Klaus had made a reasonable decision in his life? Certainly not when he had ambushed his brother at the police academy all those years ago. 

"Besides, I don't need help, Ben. I am perfectly fine. I am peachy! Everything is fine. I have a place to stay, I have great sex-" A woman he passed by looked at him in horror and pressed her hands to the ears of her little son. "I have my drugs. Everything is just fine. I don't need help. I don't need anyone, in fact." 

"Klaus, he-"

"Klaus?" The sound of the voice made him whirl around so quickly that he almost lost his balance on the icy sidewalk. "Fuck! Almost didn't recognize you, Man."

And, just like summoned, the dirty word stood before him in all his glory. Diego looked just the same as he had four years ago. Sure, he was a little bigger and had put on more muscles but other than this he was just the same man. Well, his jawline was a bit sharper. He had lost the rest of his puppy fat and he was wearing a beard very similar to the one Klaus was sporting. Of course, Diego saying that he had almost not recognized him was one awful lie that no one would believe their sibling but he decided to humor him anyway.

"Diego!" He replied with as much bravado and flourish as he could possibly muster right now and elected to ignore the way Ben snorted behind him. Stupid Ben. "Way to startle an unassuming pedestrian, dear Brother!" 

"Yeah … Uhm … sorry ‘bout that." 

"Nothing to worry about, Baby." He laughed and took a step back as Diego was taking a step towards him. "Well! Great seeing you, we should repeat that sometime!" 

"Hey- What happened to your face?" His brother made a general gesture towards his face which was, quite frankly, a bit rude.

"Oh ... that?" He huffed as he absentmindedly touched his split lips. "’Tis but a scratch. Ran into a door."

"You ran into a door?"

"Well, what can I say? I was high as a kite!"

"And the cut on your forehead?"

"Same door." 

"You sure about that?" There it was again: the patented Diego-Hargreeves-scowl paired with the patented Diego-Hargreeves-stance as he put his hands on his hips and stood before him with both feet securely on the ground. The very image of a person that was not willing to budge.

"Diego-"

"No, I’m just asking." He shrugged awkwardly. "I mean, I’m worried about you, lil’ Bro."

"Oh, so now you are worried." He chuckled. "You weren’t worried four years ago."

"Klaus-"

"No, it's okay, Dee. I would’ve kicked myself out too!" He made a point of showing as many teeth in his next smile as he possibly could before he turned around again. He couldn't stay even a second longer in Diego’s presence. Just being near his once-favorite sibling was eating away at him and he knew that he would do or say something extremely dumb if he would not get going now. "Anyway, I’m heading off."

"Klaus-" He turned around one more time to look at his brother. "Do you have any plans for Christmas yet? If you don't … I’m always glad to have you … you know that's true, right?"

"Actually, I do have plans."

"Oh?"

"I’m spending Christmas with my boyfriend."

"Boyfriend?" If he wouldn't know it any better, he would almost say that Diego sounded disappointed as he repeated the word. In a way, his brother had always been possessive of him. In a good way, of course. They had been best friends, after all. The closest out of the seven children. Perhaps they would have become more than that too … if it hadn't been for Diego’s fragile masculinity and his need to always prove to the world that he was the most macho man anyone had ever seen. Being seen as weak in any sense of the word had always been Diego’s biggest fear. And Klaus … Well, wasn’t he just the epitome of weakness. "Oh … Oh, that's nice. I’m glad you found someone … really, Man, that’s great. I’m glad you’re happy. Still, if you wanna drop by … anytime … just come to Al’s boxing gym."

Klaus gave a little nod in acknowledgment and didn't this whole interaction just feel off? Well, he assumed that had to have been expected after how they left things off four years ago. He wanted to move on without another word but then he stopped himself again shortly. 

"Give Patch my best regards." Even though that woman hated his guts. They had met only once and that one time meeting had sufficed to make that woman hate him. Well, maybe it was because she had caught him stealing from his own brother - and from her. It hadn't been his brightest moment. 

"P-Patch?" Diego repeated with furrowed brows before a bit of redness crept into his cheeks. "Oh … yeah … we broke up."

"Really?" Klaus echoed. "Fuck, Man - She was perfect for you!"

"You think so?"

"Yeah! Just as stuck up and macho. You should try to win her back. You’ll never find someone better." Diego’s face morphed into an ugly little snarl and Klaus took that as his cue to leave the situation for good finally.

"You know what?" Diego called out. "Fuck you, Klaus! Forget what I said about dropping by!" 

Klaus gave a lazy wave with his goodbye hand over his shoulder without turning back around before he rounded the next corner and moved to the front door of the apartment complex. Ben was already tutting at him with disappointment.

"Really, Dude?" He sighed. "Was this necessary?"

"Was it necessary that he beat me up last time?" Ben pinched his lips into a thin line at this comment but before he could even try to defend their brother, Klaus cut him off again. "Don't answer that, Benji. I know that you’re on his side anyway."

"I’m not!" He bristled. "Not for the beating up part! But the rest? Yes, you know what? He was right! You were the biggest asshole on the planet and you got what you deserved. You hurt him like crazy and he lashed out! You always knew how to push his buttons. You still do."

"Right." Klaus huffed as he opened the unlocked door and stepped into the entrance hall. "Because, in the end, it's always my fault. How could I forget?" 

"That's not what I-"

"Just … leave, Ben, okay? Give me some space. I’m about to enjoy Grant’s delicious Osso Bucco now." 

"Sure about that? I bet Grant will beat your ass instead for being late." As Ben didn't get an answer, however, the ghost of Klaus’ dead brother decided to vanish with a sigh to wherever he vanished to when he had enough of Klaus. Lately, that was far more often than not. Their relationship had morphed into something misshaped and ugly - much like his relationship with Grant. Maybe Ben was right. It was his own fault. 

He felt lonely and empty as he reached Grant’s apartment on the third floor without Ben. But those feeling were old friends of his by now. He had lived with them his entire life. The place didn't have an elevator and he hated climbing those stairs with a passion. Klaus didn't even need to knock on the door as it was opened from inside, revealing a fuming Grant Hancock. Oh, jolly. Another person that was pissed at him. He was entirely too sober for this kind of shit. 

"Hey, Babe. Sorry, I’m late. Ran into an old friend."

"Yeah, I saw that," Grant grunted and allowed him inside but Klaus debated to just stay outside. He could already feel the aggression sizzle in the air. "I saw you guys talk from the window. Who was that?"

"My brother. Diego." Klaus shrugged and stepped inside. He quickly got rid of his tattered coat and hung it to the coat rag like Grant wanted him to do before he slipped out of his boots and placed them neatly next to Grant’s just like Grant wanted him to do. Then, as Grant had closed and locked the door, he turned around to his boyfriend with the sweetest smile he could muster. Now it was all about disarming the man and making him less angry with Klaus.

"I’m really sorry." He purred as he stepped closer to Grant to brush his lips softly against his. Grant was a tiny bit taller than the already tall Number Four. He had always liked taller and bigger guys and Grant was packing in all the right places. He was handsome enough, he supposed but he could be outright intimidating. "I hurried as much as I could. Couldn't wait to be back home. I bet dinner’s gone cold … we should warm it up and eat and then get comfy?"

Grant gave a soft sigh in response as he dragged his fingers down the side of Klaus’ neck before squeezing gently. "You don't deserve hot food for running late." He decided and Klaus just shrugged mentally. Food was food. He used to dumpster dive.

"Yeah, you’re right, Baby. I don't deserve it." He had learned in the past couple of months to just say what Grant wanted to hear. It was easier this way. It was less painful. Sure, that didn't mean that Grant would not freak out on him again and again for the tiniest of reasons. Last time he had gotten jealous over Klaus talking to the mailman. Together they walked into the kitchen were Grant had set the table with candles and his best porcelain. He felt a little guilty for having ruined this romantic dinner and so, as he saw it, he turned around to Grant and pressed another kiss to his lips. "I’m really sorry."

"I wanted to apologize." Grant sighed and brushed his fingers almost lovingly against the cut on Klaus’ forehead. "For that. It was … uncalled for."

"It's-"

"Then again, you have to agree that you provoked me, right? You just know how to push my buttons."

"Yeah." Klaus sighed as he grabbed Grant’s hand and pressed a kiss to his knuckles. In a way, he loved this man. Then again, he didn't even know what love was supposed to feel like. Grant made him feel special. He would get possessive over him. He didn't like other people to look at Klaus. He was worried for him when he would go out alone - even if it was just to the store down the street. He was always with Klaus, giving him all the attention he could possibly want and more. He would gush to his friends about him. "I’ve heard that one a lot. Come on, sit down. Let me take care of you. It's the least I could do."

Grant hummed in approval as he sat down on his usual chair as Klaus swooped in to take his plate from Grant to stuff it in the microwave. A part of him had hoped that Grant would tell him to reheat his own food as well but as he didn't, Klaus just waited for the microwave to ping and placed the steaming plate back in front of Grant before sitting down on his own chair. With a smile, he grabbed Grant’s hand on the table again and gave it a squeeze. He waited until Grant took his first bite and only then he began to eat as well - just like Grant wanted. 

※※※※※※※

**December 2013**

"Penny for your thoughts?" Diego addressed him after he swallowed the bite in his mouth.

"What?" 

"You’ve been staring into space again. What’chu thinking about?" 

"Oh … nothing." Klaus shrugged before digging into his cold food. Diego made the best scrambled-eggs he had ever tasted. Diego, however, quickly snatched the plate from him. "Hey!"

"No, come on, Bro. Cold eggs? Disgusting. Here, take mine. I’m gonna heat ‘em up. You need to eat, Klaus. Put some meat back on those bones." Before Klaus could protest, Diego had shoved his own steaming hot plate of scrambled eggs and bacon in front of Klaus and raised to stand up and walk to the microwave. They didn't have much but at least they got a functioning microwave. "So what were you thinking about?"

He was silent for a moment longer as he was staring at Diego’s plate in front of him. "Grant." He then shrugged before taking a fork full of the eggs. What good would it be to lie to his brother anyway? Diego Hargreeves was not known to give up easily when he wanted do know something. He would pester him so long until he would spill the beans. 

"Grant?" He echoed. "That fucking asshole … don't waste your thoughts on him."

"I know … it's just … it's that time of the year again." 

"Yeah … I remember." Diego had his back to him but he could tell that he wore this conflicted little expression on his face - the one where he would furrow his brows and wrinkle his forehead and pull the corners of his mouth down a little and worry his bottom lip between his teeth. The one where he blamed himself for everything that had happened to his adopted brother in the past despite the fact that Klaus was the only one to blame for any of that.

**-End of Chapter 1-**


	2. Chapter 2

**December 2012**

The closer Christmas came, the more and more antsy Grant seemed to become. It was just the holidays missing with him, he assumed. It was normal. Everyone was kinda on edge during this time of the year.

"He’s creeping me out," Ben commented dryly as Klaus watched from his place on the bed how Grant was getting ready to leave for work. He seemed even more on edge today than he had been the last couple of days. "I really don't trust him, Klaus."

"It's just Christmas." He whispered.

"No, he’s planning something, Klaus. You should go meet Diego today, maybe tell him or ask him to stay over at his place for the holidays." As he looked at his brother sitting in the corner on the chair Grant liked to put his clothes on, Ben looked thoroughly freaked out as well. He seemed oddly serious in all this. Of course, Ben had always been a worrywart. 

"You are being dramatic, Benny." 

"He made you sleep on the floor again!"

"So what?"

"You are sick!" 

He bit back a cough just so that Ben would not get the satisfaction of actually being right. No way. So what if he was sick? It wasn’t Grant’s fault that Klaus couldn't follow the rules, right? He had never been able to do just what was expected of him! Even during his times at the academy. No wonder his father had been all up in his business all the time. He had pretty much forced his hand. 

Before Klaus could even think of an appropriate answer to give to his dead brother, Grant came back to the bedroom and leaned against the doorframe with his side. Klaus couldn't deny that a guy in a nicely tailored suit always did something to him. Maybe it was his daddy issues making themselves known. "I’m out now." He said. "Don't leave the house, okay? It's cold out and you are sick." 

"Sure, don't worry, Babe." 

"Love ya."

"Love you too." There was something so natural about saying these words. In fact, a part of him didn't even know anymore if he meant those words or not. He must mean them, right? Why else would he still be with Grant otherwise? Except for the obvious reasons, of course. Yeah, it probably was love, he assumed. There was no other explanation. None that made any kind of sense anyway. 

Grant smiled before he left the doorway and a few seconds later, he heard the door fall shut.

"So what are you gonna do now?" Ben sighed. "You gonna listen to that guy and stay home all day like a good little boy?"

He made a point of rolling his eyes before giving Ben the stink eye for his rude-ass comment. He knew exactly what his brother wanted to achieve. "Sure, why not?"

"Because you are not the type." Ben groaned. "Come on, Man! Let's go for a walk. It snowed last night!" 

"Nope. It's cold." 

"Since when did this ever stop you?"

"Since I got a roof over my head and a warm place to stay. Listen, I’m not stopping you, Bro. But I am gonna take a nice hot bath, have a drink and smoke some weed. You are invited to join me - not in the tub, of course. You know what I mean." With that, he pushed the blankets back to get up out of bed and walk straight to the bathroom. As he stopped in the doorway to look back, his brother Ben was gone and he was left with that empty little feeling in the pit of his stomach. He couldn't blame his brother for being fed up with him and this whole messed up situation. Not as he had a good look at his face in the mirror when he stepped into the bathroom. Fuck. Even if he wanted to go out … like this? Never. He didn't even own enough concealer to cover this shit up. 

It was around noon that day that there was a knock at the door. Needless to say, Klaus was not allowed to open the door to strangers or - god forbid - let strangers inside. After all, it was Grant’s apartment. He respected that. He wouldn't want strangers in his apartment either! Curiosity got the better of him, though, as he got up from the comfortable sofa and slowly shuffled towards the door. He didn't waste any time to look through the peephole. Where would be the fun in that, after all? Instead, he unlocked the door and opened it wide right away - only to wish he hadn't.

"Diego?" He groaned as he identified the person standing in front of him. "What the hell are you doing here? How did you even know where I live?" Before his brother could open his mouth he cut him off. "You followed me last time, didn't you? Geez, you are such a stalker. If I wouldn't know it any better, I would say you were obsessed with me, Bro. I mean, meeting you two times in just one month? That's just too much, Baby! You could've just told me that you had the hots for me!" 

"Klaus" Diego’s voice was more of a warning right now. "Cut the crap. What the fuck happened to your face? Did he do that to you?" 

"Who?"

"Your boyfriend!" Diego all but yelped as he shoved Klaus back and entered the apartment without waiting for consent. "He did this to you, didn't you? That's why I followed you last time! I thought that there was something wrong and apparently I was right!"

"No, you weren’t!" Klaus replied sharply. "And- what does it even concern you? It's none of your fucking business!" 

"You are my brother!" Diego replied just as hotly. "And if that guy is beating you, I won’t stand by and allow that!" 

"Oh, that's rich!" Klaus scoffed. 

"Hey, listen: I’m sorry okay? For what I did back then. I shouldn't have reacted that way-"

"No, you shouldn't have."

"You fucking stole from me and Patch!" Diego growled. "We were at the literal police academy and I took you in because you were sick and didn't know where to go! You had the audacity to steal from us and I almost got kicked out because I even smuggled you inside, Klaus! You deserved one or two punches! Not to mention that you stole Mom’s pearls and wanted to pawn them off!"

"Well, you didn't need me to get kicked out of the academy, right?" The way Diego clenched and unclenched his fists told him clearly that Diego was tempted to punch him again. He didn't though. Instead, he brushed a hand through his hair.

"Anyway." He ended the discussion - or at least tried to because Klaus was fucking petty as hell. "I am sorry, Brother. I was angry and disappointed in you. I shouldn't have beaten you up like I did back then. But that doesn't mean that I wouldn't care about you now, right? And if that guy is mistreating you, I won't stand by and let him do this to you. You are my brother. I love you. So if you need help because you don't know where to go from here … I’m here for you, okay?" 

"Sure," Klaus replied with as much venom as he could while he made a point of smiling sweetly at his brother. "Just like you always were there for me, right? Just like last time, when I asked you not to bring me to the hospital and yet you just brought me there and left, right?" 

"I just wanted to help you."

"Yeah … That's all you guys ever want to do."

"That's not fair."

"Nothing in this family is fair, Diego. And, if you don't mind, I would ask you to leave. Grant doesn’t appreciate strangers in his home." Diego gave a deep sigh at this before he finally walked back to the door looking more like a drowned cat than like the vigilante he wanted to portray to the world. Only as he was already almost out of the door he stopped again to look at Klaus. 

"Do you love him? This Grant-dude?" There was something in this simple question that Klaus could not quite put his finger on. Jealousy, perhaps? No, those times were long gone. The train had left the platform. They had missed their chance years and years ago when they had still been just bratty teenagers. 

"Of course. Would I be here otherwise?" His brother’s answer was a curt little nod before he finally turned around to leave the apartment for good. Klaus himself lingered for a moment longer, watching how Diego was retreating towards the stairs before he closed the door and locked it again. 

※※※※※※※

**December 2013**

He sat on the sofa in their tiny living room and watched how Diego got ready to leave. His punching bag hung near the window in the corner, Klaus’ easel and paints on the opposite side of the boxy little room, near their small dining table that they had found on the bulky waste. He had his sketchbook on his lap and tried to focus his mind on anything but the other man in the room as Diego was putting on his harness to strap the knives to his chest and hips. 

Diego had gotten him the sketchbook for their birthday. Klaus had gotten him new boxing gloves. Money was tight but they made do since Klaus had actually found a job at a coffee shop and Diego still worked full time at the gym. Al had even decided to employ Diego as a trainer too now. Sketching and painting and drawing usually served to calm Klaus’ fluttering nerves and quiet the ghosts just enough. Without the drugs, it wasn’t easy, of course, but he managed. 

Today it wasn’t so easy. In the world around him, families were getting ready for the night before Christmas. Children were bugging their parents about staying up late for Santa. People were doing last-minute shopping and gift wrapping. Soon, the entire city would be covered under a blanket of snow and silence. White Christmas. Just like it was supposed to be. Diego and Klaus didn't have a Christmas tree. They never had this tradition while growing up. In their house, they had never celebrated Christmas. A part of him wanted to call Luther and Vanya over. He wouldn't, though. He would wake up tomorrow morning and act as if it was just a normal day. Maybe they would go to Griddy’s for food as a special treat. 

He watched how Diego put on his domino mask and something inside of him hurt just looking at it. He knew why. It was not a new feeling. He didn't want Diego to go out. Usually, he didn't have a problem with it. He didn't want to be alone though. Not tonight. He wanted to snuggle up on the couch and watch stupid Christmas movies on their rabbit-ear TV until they would fall asleep. He wanted to spend every free minute with Diego. 

"I’m headed off now," Diego said as he walked over to their door. "Don't stay up too late or Santa won’t come to bring you any gifts."

"Me? Gifts?" Klaus huffed. "I’m not getting any. I was a naughty boy." 

Diego just gave a fond roll of his eyes in response. He hesitated though, as his hand rested on the doorknob as if he was unsure if he should stay or not. His entire posture screamed at Klaus to just say the words and he would stay.

"Be safe out there." He said instead and wished immediately he hadn't.

**-End of Chapter 2-**


	3. Chapter 3

**December 2012**

It was snowing outside of the living room window when Grant came home that night. Outside, people were preparing for Christmas. Tomorrow morning, millions of children would squeal in delight at the dawn of the day over their new toys. Tonight, parents would scramble for explanations of why their children couldn't possibly stay up late to see Santa. Quite a few mothers and fathers would have to eat a few cookies with milk tonight, he assumed. He could only guess, of course. After all, that was never something that he had experienced for himself. Their father had snuffed out their belief in Santa and the Easter Bunny when they hadn't even been four years of age yet. All his Christmas-knowledge stemmed from Hollywood.

Thinking of Hollywood… "Hey, Babe!" He turned to Grant with a smile. "Right on time! Let's order pizza and watch a movie. My sister is on TV tonight." He missed her. Seeing her face on TV was the closest he would ever get to her again. However, as he looked at Grant, his boyfriend didn't seem amused at all.

"What's wrong?"

"You tell me." He growled. "Mrs. Levitt told me she saw how you let a man into my apartment yesterday."

"I did- Oh that was just my brother." He tried to play it cool even though he knew that he had fucked up in even allowing Diego to enter the apartment. Not that he had allowed him inside. He shouldn't have opened the door.

"Your brother, huh?" The way Grant was coming towards him was threatening. Still, Klaus got up from his seat near the window and walked over to Grant. The best way to move forward from here was be as sweet as possible to calm the beast. "Or rather one of the guys you call over to fuck you?"

"What?" He chuckled. "I don't have anyone beside you, Grant."

"Sure you have. In the end, you are still just the whore I found on the streets, right? Desperate for a cock and drugs." 

"Okay, you know what?" Klaus growled as he was finally right in front of his boyfriend and finally fed up with his paranoia. He could deal with a bit of jealousy, he could deal with a bit of rage even. But enough was enough. "I have enough of this bullshit, okay? You knew exactly who I was when you took me in. So what I’m a whore? Desperate times call for desperate measures and such. No shame in that. After all, you  _ wanted  _ that whore, right? So what does that make you? Couldn't get a nice normal guy? Had to buy one off the street?" 

Provoking Grant was always a mistake but for some reason, he was unable to stop himself from digging his hole deeper. Maybe it had been his meeting with Diego that led him to behave like this. Diego had always had a bad influence on him - even though Diego would say it was exactly the other way around. This time, however, he anticipated the punch that Grant was throwing his way and stepped aside quickly enough to escape it, but not quickly enough to escape his grasp as Grant grabbed him by the collar and threw him into the glass coffee table.

He heard the shattering of the glass more than that he felt the impact. For a second, he just laid there trying to breathe as his lungs were suddenly refusing to take in any air. It was the surprise or the shock he told himself. Before he could grasp what had just happened, Grant was looming over him again with fury written all over his face.

"Look what you’ve done!" Grant shouted while Klaus still tried to gather his bearings and get back up from the ground. He didn't even get as far as a sudden kick got him off balance again. He barely felt how he sliced his left hand on the glass on the ground. Everything that happened after this was kind of a blur. 

He barely remembered how he managed to get out of the apartment. He found himself out in the snowy streets of the city, slowly staggering along the sidewalk and trying not to fall. There were barely people around this late at night, not in the night before Christmas, but the few that saw him looked at him weirdly. They probably thought that he was tripping balls. He wished that would be true. At least then he wouldn't be in so much pain. 

For once, Ben was not there to pester him and he didn't know if he was glad about it or desperate for his brother’s presence. Right now he was just cold and in pain and he didn't know where to go. He had waited for Grant to fall asleep after he had drunken himself into a stupor and escaped from the apartment without grabbing his coat or even his shoes. It wasn't the first time that he felt this way. It was the first time in a while, sure, but he was, sadly, used to feeling like this. It came with the territory. He remembered the first time he felt like this - confused, lost, and desperate. Barely eighteen and already a year on the streets. It had been cold out and he had had no place to sleep so he had slept under a bridge until he had been discovered by some random thug with a knife. That night he had been sure he would die and yet here he was. Still alive somehow. By some miracle.

Or maybe he was cursed. Death seemed like mercy sometimes. 

For what felt like hours he was staggering through the city until he finally ended up in front of Al’s boxing gym. This late at night it was closed, of course. He wanted to break down crying in front of the dark gym as he saw the neon sign switched off. The snow had gotten worse again in the past few minutes. He felt like a complete idiot for coming to this place after how he had scared his brother off before. Surely, his Diego wouldn't even want to see him right now. Not that he had any chance of putting this hypothesis to the test either, right? The place was locked up and dark and Diego was probably not even here anyway. 

As the wind started picking up again and blew snow straight into his face, Klaus decided to walk into the alley next to the gym. It was still cold but at least it was a little more shielded from the harsh wind. Exhausted he sat down in front of a steel door to the side of the gym. Probably the staff door. However, since he didn't even know where the boiler room was located, knocking against the door would be fruitless. Instead, he settled down and curled up on himself as much as his aching body allowed.

He was sure that he looked like shit and he didn't need Ben’s comments to know that. Ben wasn’t here to deliver commentary anyway. He had given up on Klaus like everyone else. He missed his ghostly brother more than he would have imagined in such a situation. He was freezing cold without his coat and shoes. Right now he was staring at his wet socks. 

It was dark around him as there was no light in the alley but even if it would be brightly lit around him, Klaus would still see black spots dance in front of his eyes. He was so tired. He knew that he was going to fall asleep if he wouldn't do something against it. And falling asleep would sign his death sentence for good. He should get back up and walk around but he couldn't move. He didn't dare to move. Every bone in his entire body hurt too much and sleep just sounded wonderful right now.

"What the hell? Klaus? Is that you?" He just winced at the sharpness of Diego’s voice and although he was glad that his brother had, by some miracle, found him, right now he was too ashamed to have proved him right. "Hey … fuck, Bro! What the fuck happened? Hey, open your eyes! You hear me?"

When had his eyes even slipped close? He hadn't noticed it. It took him much more effort to open his eyes than it should, though. As he did, he was almost blinded by the beam of Diego’s flashlight. And, there he was. Right in front of him as if he had been sent by the heavens or sprung out of the pages of some cheesy-ass romance novel, his hands hovering with uncertainty in front of Klaus’ face. "Shit … Shit, Klaus. Fuck." Truly, he was amazed by the variety of Diego’s vocabulary. "Come, We’ll get you inside and cleaned up and … warm." 

As his brother’s hands were suddenly upon him, his first instinct was to lash out but Diego quickly caught his flailing limbs and grabbed him securely around his wrists. "Hey! Hey … It's okay! It's just me. Just Diego. You’re safe now, Bro." 

He allowed Diego to haul him to his feet and was more or less dragged inside by Number Two. He didn't resist Diego as he was dragging him down a dark corridor and neither as he kicked open a metal door and led him into a room. It was warm inside and as Diego switched on the light, Klaus came face to face with the boiler room of Al’s boxing gym. When Diego had told him to come to the gym, he had not even questioned why or where his brother was living. Now, however, it became painstakingly clear to Klaus that his brother’s living conditions were barely any better than his own. 

"Nice apartment, Bro." He tried to joke as he took in the scarce furniture down in the room even though he didn't quite feel like it at all. He just wanted to curl up somewhere and sleep for fucking ever. Instead, his brother helped him down a couple of stairs into the heart of his nest until he discarded Klaus onto his bed in the corner. "Real cozy here."

"Shut up." Diego frowned as his face came painfully back into view now. He was sure that he looked even worse in the light of the boiler room now. Poor Diego … Once again left with picking up the pieces. It was always him who was left to make everything right again. Fuck … He almost felt sorry for his brother. Then again, Diego did have a savior complex. "Jesus, Klaus…" He repeated his statement from earlier. "I’m gonna patch you up, okay? I need you to tell me though where your injuries are, okay?"

"It's not that bad, really." Klaus shrugged. "I’ve had it worse."

"That was this bastard, right? Your boyfriend." As Klaus didn't answer, Diego let out a groan and disappeared from Klaus’ field of vision again. However, he could see Ben standing in the corner, his arms crossed disapprovingly. Hell, wasn’t he just the most judgmental ghost ever? No matter what he was doing, it was never right in good old Benny’s eyes. A second later, Diego was back at his side with a plastic bowl filled with water and a washcloth. 

He allowed his brother to clean off the blood from his face and skin so that he was able to inspect the damage done to his face before he moved to his cut-up hand. "Fuck, that needs stitching." Diego sighed. "I’m not gonna lie, I am not nearly as good as Mom in that regard." Diego did his best to move quickly and efficiently as he took care of most of his wounds and Klaus only stopped him when he wanted to get rid of Klaus’ shirt.

"It's okay, Dee." He sighed at last. "No cuts underneath there … Just bruises. It's okay."

"Yeah … Still, you need a change of clothes. Your shit is wet and cold." Diego scowled but raised his hands in surrender. "Okay, let me take care of your hand at least and then I’ll let you change in privacy." Even though Klaus had never cared much for privacy in the past, right? But Diego could probably tell that this situation was far from being normal, right? Right. He felt so fucking stupid for coming to his brother for help after everything he had done and said and fucked up in the past. And why? Because he managed to score himself an abusive boyfriend. Awesome.

"Sure, make me beautiful again, Brother."

Diego gave a soft roll of his eyes and ruffled his hair as he got up to fetch everything he needed to stitch up Klaus’ hand. "You don't need me for that, Sunshine," Diego replied almost mockingly. It was an attempt to make a joke to lighten the mood. A part of him had missed this little back and forth banter between him and his brother. He and Diego had always been carefree with one another. Never awkward, never weird. They could have been glorious if they hadn't been such pussies. Maybe his life would look different now if one of them had dared to make a step forward instead of jumping back in fear. 

Getting his hand stitched-up was far from being pleasant but Klaus was the last person to complain. He had a high tolerance for pain, after all, and in comparison was Grant had done to him tonight it seemed child’s play. 

"Would you look at that … My poor tattoo." Klaus huffed as he watched how Diego was dragging the needle through his skin one last time. It was funny, really, how Diego’s fear of needles seemed to be very selective at times. Show him a syringe and he will pass out right away but give him a sewing needle to stitch a flesh wound back together? No problem. 

"Don’t worry, you’ll get it fixed." Diego sighed and cut off the string before he went about wrapping his hand in gauze. He lingered for a moment with Klaus’ hand in his own before he raised to his feet and started tidying up his medical supplies. Clearing his throat awkwardly, Diego went about pulling a pair of sweatpants and a large sweatshirt from his days at the police academy out of his dresser before thrusting both items at Klaus, followed by a pair of rolled-up gym socks. "Here, change." He smiled before he started walking back to the door.

"Where are you going?" Klaus asked even though he already knew the answer. 

"Teaching someone a fucking lesson." 

※※※※※※※

**December 2013**

Around midnight, he was still lying awake in the living room to the muffled sound of the TV running quietly in the background. There was some old black and white Christmas movie going on right now. He didn't care enough to actually turn his head and look at the TV, though. Instead, he found himself staring at his left hand and the scar that was running through the word ‘Goodbye’ in black ink. He hadn't even tried until now to have it redone. They didn't have the money and it didn't seem important. The scar was a reminder of what he had gone through last year, of course, but not inherently in a bad way either. His experience with Grant was not completely bad. It had given him perspective if nothing else and the opportunity to turn his life around. 

Sure, he had spent days on end vomiting his guts out afterward and thus ruining New Year’s Eve for his brother Diego as he had been holding back Klaus’ sweat-soaked curls in a tiny bathroom stall inside the boxing gym but … still. What had happened with Grant had led to a new life at Diego’s side. His brother had taken him in, taken him under his wing, had helped him to get clean and stay clean. This had been Diego’s only condition in that regard. For Klaus to ditch the drugs. It had been hard. It was still hard. He was better now, though. Of course, life was far from being perfect but he was better now. And this scar reminded him of that too. If he had never met Grant and gotten into this situation with him … perhaps he would still be out on the streets - a useless junkie hooker and nothing more than that. In a way, he was thankful for that god-awful experience. 

"You are awfully quiet today." Ben hummed from where he was perched on the battered green armchair standing slightly off to the side. An old lady from two floors down had given it to them when they moved in, mumbling something about the ‘adorable gays’ in apartment 9c to her friend.

"Am I?"

Ben hummed in agreement. "Reminiscing about the past?"

"Hey … Remember how Dee came back that night?" There was no need to specify which night he meant to neither Ben nor Diego. It was only ‘that night’ and everyone involved would know what he was talking about. Easy as that. 

"How could I forget?" Ben huffed. "He looked as if he had straight out murdered the guy. I mean … I wouldn't have faulted him for it. Not after what he did to you." 

"Aww, so sweet, Benjamin." Klaus chuckled in response. "No one ever did something like this for me. Don't get me wrong, I don't condone my big brother going around beating my ex-boyfriends up and such but … Knowing that he was willing to do something like this for me … It felt good."

"You are such a damsel."

"Am not." He was very tempted to throw the pillow under his head at Benny but he was just too damn comfortable right now.

"And totally in love with our dear brother."

"Big surprise." Klaus huffed. "I still don't know what to do, though."

"There’s a mistletoe hanging in the kitchen."Ben offered. "You put it there yourself." 

"I can't just … take it and hold it over his head and kiss him."

"Why? You kissed strangers for far less."

"Yeah, but he’s- He’s … Diego. This is different."

"Because he is our brother."

"Because he’s Diego." Klaus sighed and drove his hand through his curls. "Look … I don't wanna fuck this up like I fuck everything up, got it? I … This is too … I really love him, Ben." 

"In that case, you should just tell him."

"And then what? Risk that he kicks me out? Risk that he is disgusted with me?"

"Would it help you if I would tell you that he has been practicing in front of his mirror how he was going to tell you that he loves you?"

At once he sat up straight. "He did what? Why didn't you tell me?"

"I didn't want to get involved." Ben grinned. Oh, that smug dead bastard! Ben and not wanting to get involved? Ben was the embodiment of Gossip Girl! He had nothing else to do but involve himself in Klaus’ dramas! "That's something between you guys and I am not stupid enough to get involved in this mess. I thought Diego would sooner or later get his shit together and just do it but I see that you two are both just too helpless." 

"So what now?"

"You need to get over yourself and just kiss him," Ben said rolling his eyes. "It's not that hard." 

Yes, he said that but Klaus was terrified of the prospect of ruining anything with Diego. How fucking stupid. He had never been scared of anything except ghosts. Yet, this just felt different. It felt huge. It felt dangerous. It felt monumental. One wrong move and he would fall into the abyss and lose everything. 

He didn't know when he had fallen asleep after he finally went to bed but he was at last shaken awake by the sounds of someone rummaging through the apartment. He sat up straight in a flash, suddenly alarmed by the sounds inside the apartment. His first instinct was to call out to Diego before remembering that he wasn’t even here right now. Shit. Even after Diego had tried to teach him as much as he could about fighting techniques, he was still not a talented fucking fighter, and right now someone was trying to steal their shit! On Christmas no less!

He couldn't just stay in bed and let it happen though, right? "Ben!" He hissed but didn't get a response and there was no sign of Ben in his small bedroom either. Reluctantly he got out of his bed and slowly crept to his ajar door. He never closed his door completely. It was an old habit from his childhood days when the ghosts had been too loud and the fear too strong. Not that the ghosts would be much more silent these days. 

After gathering his courage and taking a deep steadying breath, Klaus poked his head out of the door to cast a look into the living room. There was a figure crouched near the window on the ground. He could see it clearly how the person was fumbling around with something. It took him a second, though before he realized that there was something much larger in front of the window.

Without thinking, Klaus reached over to the light switch between his door and Diego’s door and switched on the light inside the living room at once. The person on the ground startled so much they actually jumped. Suddenly, Klaus was faced with his brother Diego standing by a tree in their living room. Had there always been a tree there? He was almost sure that the tree was new. Weird. It was not any kind of tree either as it turned out then the longer Klaus just stared at the situation at hand. It seemed to be a Christmas tree. A real, honest to God, Christmas tree - like the people on TV gathered around every year. Minus the decoration. 

"Hey there, Santa." He tried humoring his brother with a wink during their sudden and unexpected wild-west standoff. He clearly caught Diego off guard right now. Sure enough, Diego turned a bright red as he nervously fiddled with one of his knives that he had probably pulled from his harness as he jumped in surprise. "Where did you find that tree?"

"It was supposed to be a surprise." Diego replied as if that would actually explain the sudden appearance of a tree in their apartment. Well, to him that was probably explanation enough. Diego had always been a rather practical guy and so, just seeing that his brother had brought in a Christmas tree, made his heart jump a little more than it had any right to. Still, he couldn't quite shake the words Ben had said earlier from his mind now. 

"Yeah … I gathered as much." Klaus gave a small chuckle as he leaned against his door frame and crossed his arms leisurely. "But why?"

"I just thought…" Diego started and then stopped, seemingly unable to find the words he wanted to say before he gave a low grunt and threw his hands in the air in defeat. "I just thought it would be nice, you know? Since we never had a real Christmas before and after what happened last year … I wanted to make it special for you this year. You deserve this … I mean … after Grant and getting clean and … everything else." 

He caught a glimpse of Ben appearing out of thin air near the tree with a smug grin on his face and as his brother made a rather obvious hand gesture towards Diego, Klaus finally gave up. If Ben was right and had not lied to him earlier than Diego needed Klaus to build a bridge between them. Diego might be a vigilante and, generally, a courageous man who threw himself head-first into danger but when it came to shit like this … He was sometimes rather helpless. To this day, Diego sometimes still reminded him of the teenage boy Klaus had loved so long ago. So, Klaus walked over to Diego and brushed the tips of his fingers over one fir branch to examine and feel the texture. It was even a real tree, not a plastic one. 

"So you got out in the middle of the night to get a Christmas tree?" Klaus smirked just to watch Diego squirm a little more. "For me?"

"Well … I mean, I had this planned for a while. Actually, Al stored the tree for me for a few days now and … I wanted to surprise you, that's all." 

"You succeeded big guy." Klaus grinned and just as Diego wanted to turn away in his flustered state - a state Klaus only rarely got to enjoy - Klaus caught him quickly by the wrist. Before Diego could say or do anything or even try to flee, Klaus had wound his arms tightly around Diego’s neck and smashed his lips against those of the vigilante. The kiss was not at all how he imagined it to be in the lonely hours of the night or back in the day in his teenage bedroom. It was not the wild animalistic little thing he had thought it would be. After the initial surprise waned off, Diego’s lips were soft against his, his fingers gentle as they buried in Klaus’ curls, his grip strong as he held onto his back to keep him close. Their mouths molded together as if that was their entire purpose in life, as if they had been made and formed exactly for this reason alone. The feeling sent sparks all through Klaus’ body and made his toes go numb. Sometimes, he was still not sure what love felt like but maybe that was it. Numb toes. 

As they broke the kiss after what felt like hours, Diego breathed out a chuckle so close to his lips that he could feel his breath ghost over his skin. "Was about time." Diego hummed against Klaus’ lips, unwilling to truly let go of him now that they finally bridged that distance between them. It seemed impossible to let go of the other man now. 

Last Christmas, his situation had seemed so bleak and unfriendly. He had been willing to let Grant treat him like utter shit just so that he wouldn't need to be out in the streets fighting for his survival. He had allowed himself to think that this was what love was like and that one always had to bow down to another. In the end, Grant had left him a shattered mess on the floor and it had been Diego who cleaned up the mess and put the pieces back together. Not once had the other man put him down or treated him any less than like the most precious thing he had ever seen. It seemed, Klaus thought, this year he had found a better recipient for his bleeding deformed little heart. With Diego, he thought, it was safe. 

"Yeah, it was," Klaus replied breathlessly at last. "And we didn't even need that mistletoe I set up." 

**-End of Chapter 3-**


End file.
